I don’t usually share personal stories online. My kind of personal posts would always be connected to sharing opinions about my favorite books, Asian dramas, or TV shows. So, not so personal actually, but this time I decided to finally share what has been bugging my mind lately.
Who deserves it? How to know when to give it?
When I was younger, I was never the type who gave second chances because I believe that you wouldn’t do anything to screw up something you treasure so much. But as I got older, I realized that there are things that deserve a second chance, and things you shouldn’t give up on easily. That’s what age does to you children haha
Here’s what happened. Last year, I got to know this Lovebug (let’s call him lovebug lol) through a friend, and we hit it off immediately. We became friends because he was makulit(persistent?) and would always send me messages or calls me whenever he’s free(btw, he works overseas). After a year of communicating, he got a vacation which gave us an opportunity to finally meet. I came with my bestfriend, and right after that meet up he decided to pursue me. I am an old fashioned, probinsyana girl so wooing just me was not enough. You’d have to meet my dad, my friends, my closest colleagues, and gain their approval, which he did, because for me, the opinions of those closest to me matters because they’ve been with me for the longest time. I was feeling ecstatic, because he seemed like The One.
I knew it was too good to be true because everything was falling into place. It was until before my birthday when everything fell apart. He told me there was this other girl who admitted her feelings to him, and he chose her. He thought since we were just starting to get to know each other, I wouldn’t have mind if he stopped right there. He was wrong. I was so disappointed and hurt after knowing what he did. I even thought it was my fault because I wasn’t the type of person who easily gets close to people, that maybe he misunderstood my actions. Maybe he thought I didn’t care enough, that I never had feelings for him. *I told him everything, I think after a week has passed. Months passed and I got over it because I realized he wasn’t such a significant part of my life yet. I got myself to thinking that we weren’t just destined for each other, no matter how good we were together.
After what happened, we stayed friends. We would occasionally send messages and just ask how the other’s doing. It wasn’t the same anymore but I was sincerely wishing him well, because that’s how nice I am LOL, but kidding aside I am nice.
A few weeks ago Lovebug came back, asking for a second chance…
I told him how I feel about him coming back, and told him I need time because whatever I felt before isn’t there anymore. Maybe there’s still a little bit, but what’s really eating me up right now is doubt, doubt that he’d leave me hanging again. He said he’s willing to wait, and that this time there’s no going back his word. And that he’s going to prove himself worthy of a second chance.
Right now, I’m not sure where this will go. He’s giving me time and maybe if he proves himself worthy maybe I’ll give us a chance again or maybe not. It’s too early to say.
Would you give him another chance?